So... remember how you wanted us to get a group tattoo and you wanted it to be iwa birds? Well, after you passed away, I promised myself I would. I even saw a guy and started planning out the design, and had the actual day scheduled to get inked, but a few days before I chickened out and canceled. I wasn't sure about the design anymore and just got cold feet.
I still plan to get a tattoo with an iwa (or possibly plural-- my original design included 3 birds flying together), but I'm waiting on it... Maybe next year on your birthday...we'll see. I know I want it though. I want some sort of permanence etched on my body. Some proof that "Tawny wuz hea" grafittied on to me. I was against it when you were alive, always putting you off, but now I want it badly-- when I finally work up the guts, that is.
Because I didn't get the tattoo just yet, I decided to do something else to put you into permanence. There's this guy... Ninja Rob. He's an artist who uses tree pieces and as he puts it, "collaborates with the wood." He uses the textures and patterns to create his art. I first saw his art awhile back, read his bio and got a little teary eyed because it was honest and fresh and so incredibly endearing. He loves trees and that made me love him. I remember even back then thinking about you and thinking you would like his work too.
Anyways, I've contracted him to create a piece in honor of you. The night we met to discuss the project, I talked his ear off about you. It was not eloquent, and I probably sounded crazy. I gave him too many irrelevant facts about you. Like how in high school you used to sit in the center console of my car so that we could all ride in the front together... and how when you declared yourself a vegetarian, you would eat the skin off the mochiko chicken and say it didn't count because you were just eating the batter... But he listened and was kind with his time and in absorbing my ramblings. And, I trust his artistic style. I'm excited to see what he's going to create and I hope that wherever you are, you will be able to see it and that you will love it. I also wouldn't be surprised if you might be guiding him now as he creates it... He asked for a picture of you to look at as a way to connect with you while he works on it. I like that he did that.
He's someone I think you would have liked a lot. Maybe even crushed on. When I met with him, I couldn't help but wonder what you would have thought about him. He's married and you're dead so it's a pointless thought, but one that still danced through my head.
I always worried about your choices in men while you were alive. You were so amazing but you seemed to fall for the wrong guys... it's something I never told you outright, and I sort of wished I did, but I'm not sure it would have made a difference. We all have our "things..."
Anyways... I love you and miss you so much. I hope you are well.
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